Selfie-satisfied? Or Selfie-Obsessed?

I have a little test for you. It starts like this:

You’re preparing for a friend’s party, your hair is done, your makeup flawless and you’re looking pretty darn hot-to-trot in that new little black strapless thingy you purchased last week. How many of you would consider then and there to pull out your phone in the bathroom and take a selfie?

Yep, it’s a common sight on the internet- the bathroom selfie, goddess-features inundating the online newsfeed, glamorous and picturesque images of divine beauty, often all taken from the same flattering angle, sometimes with an added filter for artistic effect and a very modest, humble and almost self-hating caption like “Just a little prep for Justine’s tonight” or “My new black * brand-name * dress, pity my hair totally didn’t work out” or “All ready to hit the town with my favourite girls”.

It’s common enough. And most of us wouldn’t even think twice about seeing a selfie, taking a selfie, or commenting on a selfie. But here is my question: Would you take a picture of yourself, touch it up to ensure you look your best, print out 200+ copies and then hand then hand each print out to one of your friends, maybe even to thrust the images in their faces and frantically ask “Do you think this is pretty?”; “What do you think about this dress?”’ “I look way too fat don’t I?!”; “Please tell me I’m beautiful!”; “Why didn’t you say you liked my photo?”; “Do you think I’m prettier than Georgia’s picture?”.

We can laugh at the hilarity and absurdity of that setting, but do we not already do this on social media? We are encouraged and drawn into a culture so self-obsessed, so dependent on continual validation to maintain their sense of self-worth and esteem. It is unhealthy, it is gluttonous, vain and addicting. But it is our culture. It is our generation. We have normalised this form of shameless self-promotion, and creating a comparison culture, where every individual male and female is sexually objectified, judged by their appearance and blatantly and publically compared to others. The most frightful aspect of this new ‘selfie addiction’ however, is that youth are becoming dependent on it; dependent on the reactions given by their online peers and ‘friends’; dependent on the assurances that they are indeed beautiful or incredibly ‘ripped’ which in turn has become a defining quality in determining how ‘worthy’ you are as a person, and how valued you are in the community.
This focus on self-image and validation by online strangers is driving increasing insecurities in today’s teenagers and young adults. How can we possibly compete with the ‘beautiful’ images of people plastered online? How disgusting must we be, if all those pictures online are of ‘real’ people? We forget so easily of the technological manipulation, the staging and setting of the posted photos, and so often fall back into the mode of comparing our lowlights and flaws to everyone else’s highlight reels. It’s not hard to understand then, why body dysmorphia, depression, eating disorders and heightened insecurities leading to anxiety disorders are becoming so prevalent in young people today. Not only are we addicted to ‘selfies’ and becoming fixated upon the online response they receive, but we are further propagating our own sexual objectification and focusing the online community to unhealthy/unrealistic body image goals by the usage of certain ‘hashtags’ such as #nomakeupselfie, #bikinibabes, #blonde, #model, #thighgap.

“OK, selfies are a little vain, but everyone does them, and hey- they’re not that bad….”

Selfies are benign you say?
The reality is shocking. A recent article posted on Mirror News, told the story of Danny Bowman; a 19 year old who dropped out of school, didn’t leave his house in 6 months, and attempted suicide when he couldn’t take the perfect photo [1]. Danny is one of the few publicised cases of a very serious mental health problem brewing in today’s youth….selfie addiction leading to an internet-derived manifestation of body dysmorphic disorder (DSM IV). The story is astounding, with Danny admitting he would take up to 200 selfies a day, often spending about 3 minutes on each selfie, (~10hrs/day!) in his obsession to obtain the ideal image. The addiction stemmed from this ‘validation cycle’ when he was 15 and on Facebook. The article quotes Danny: “People would comment on them, but children can be cruel. One told me my nose was too big for my face and another picked on my skin. I started taking more and more to try to get the approval of my friends.” “I would be so high when someone wrote something nice but gutted when they wrote something unkind.” [1]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X2wTpah9Wfc
Danny is an extreme case, with his addiction culminating in a suicide attempt; but as Dr David Veal – a psychiatrist who helped Danny recover – stated that selfie addiction “is (becoming) a serious problem. It’s not a vanity issue. It’s a mental health one which has an extremely high suicide rate” [1] and is becoming so widespread that is now recognized as a mental illness. The addiction preys on the insecurities and vulnerabilities of adolescents and young adults, who are developing a sense of identity and concept of self-worth. In fact, Dr Veal stated that “”Two out of three of all the patients who come to see (him) with Body Dysmorphic Disorder since the rise of camera phones have a compulsion to repeatedly take and post selfies on social media sites.” [2]

So how far does this selfie-craze have to go before we recognize something needs to be done? It is foolish to ask the internet population to cease taking selfies- it is unfortunately become an integral part of our culture and validation of self-esteem. What we need to encourage and begin proactively doing, is not participating in sexually objectifying selfies, to refrain from posting images of yourself online that have retouched, edited, or have simply been posted for attention and compliments. We do not wish to see your bedroom mess reflected in your wardrobe mirror, we’d rather see your new bikini’s on at the beach with a group of friends rather than in the dressing room of a shop; we definitely do not enjoy the photos of you looking pristine at the gym (surely I’m not the only one who looks disgusting and on the brink of respiratory collapse and exercise-induced anaphylaxis during exercise? Let alone having a hand too sweaty to even take a selfie?). It is not flattering, no matter how gorgeous you look, or how great your muscles look in the light, but bathroom selfies simply cry vanity and insecurity. Post your selfies, but ask yourself before you do, Why am I posting this? Am I celebrating an event? Am I announcing a new haircut? Or are you doing it for confirmation and reassurance of how ‘thin’ and pretty you are, or how toned and defined you’ve become? Are you secretly wishing to create envy? We are all guilty of it. But we do not do it out of sheer vanity, narcissism or egotism to begin with, we do it because we feel pressured to conform, to be approved of, or perhaps initially just to also show your new outfit, and share with your friends how glamorous you may be looking. Beware of when it takes hold, the addiction and the insecurities. You do not need the approval of online acquaintances. You are not defined by your appearance.

 

 

 

 

Body Dysmorphia Video

 

 

 

 

 

 

COMIC RELIEF

A hilarious blog on the ‘worst type of selfies’ – Can you relate?

A Funny look at “the 12 types of selfies” and “what they say about you”

 

 

 

References

[1]Aldridge G, Harden K. Selfie addict took TWO HUNDRED a day – and tried to kill himself when he couldn’t take perfect photo. [Online] 23 March 2014. 2014 Available from: http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/real-life-stories/selfie-addict-took-two-hundred-3273819 [Accessed 30 Mar 2014].

[2]Unknown. Selfies Linked to Narcissism, Addiction and Mental Illness. Disclose.tv, Weblog. [Online] Available from: http://www.disclose.tv/news/Selfies_Linked_to_Narcissism_Addiction_and_Mental_Illness/101410 [Accessed: 30 Mar 2014].

Facebook Envy….Why are today’s adolescents so jealous, so alone, so miserable?

Is Facebook Making You Miserable?

If identity is shaped by the society around us, then we can assume that children and adolescents today are under tremendous pressure to conform to the unrealistic ideals and images bombarded by the media and internet community. The nature of online social interaction means that we do not get the “full, realistic picture”, but rather the edited versions of people, their ‘highlight reels’ of perfection. Hiding behind the online subterfuge, users cannot sufficiently engage in their environment or community as effectively as would face-to-face encounters. The online movement, has resulted in reduced communication skills, understanding of non-verbal language cues and facial expression. Furthermore, individuals are drawn into the false impression that due to residing in the privacy of their own home/ workplace, behind a computer screen and using a pseudonym or different online persona, that the usual social conventions, expectations and manners/etiquette apply. As a result, individuals are disinhibited and much more likely to respond in a more harsher, denigrating and detrimental manner than they may usually do in confrontation or arguments. The social networking explosion has given birth to a new generation of attention-seeking, self-promoting individuals, each competing for their voice to be heard and recognized amongst the millions of people suddenly in our ‘community’ as opposed to the smaller, more intimate social environments in the past. Social media profiles, utilize image, ‘likes’, status updates, comments and popularity as a gauge of a person’s character and thus do not just attract a more narcissistic and self-obsessed population, but actively encourage all of its members to participate and engage in the judgmental way of thinking and behavior. So for an individual user then, the effect of participating in an environment that focuses on appearance and superficiality whilst simultaneously being fed lies and unrealistic images, hidden behind lines of code and photo-shopped images, how can possibly expect individuals to not suffer from insecurities and anxiety? How do we learn to distinguish fact from fiction?

And perhaps more importantly, how do we teach young, newer users of social media to discriminate between reality and fiction?

“Facebook Envy”….A precursor to “Facebook Depression?”

On the surface, social media websites like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter appear benign, even beneficial in establishing and encouraging social engagement, communication and interaction. So why is it that we often are left feeling dissatisfied, disillusioned and discontent?

Let’s set the scene: you’re home on the weekend, with little planned, except to complete a couple of errands, maybe some homework, an assignment, or if you’re working- maybe with the sole intention of relaxing. It’s fair to say in your prastinating boredom, you resort to the computer and log in to your favourite social media website to see what everyone else is up to. Surely a little Facebooking will take your mind off things, like the stressful week at school/work/uni, the fight you had with your partner and the pile of homework/assignments/bills that threaten to give even the 7 wonders of the world a run for their money. So you start absentmindedly trawling through the Facebook newsfeed, and what you see is picture after picture of friends on vacation, traversing the world, participating in exciting activities and events. You see Sam’s new car, Josh and Tracy’s new house on the beach front, Jeremy’s night out where he met his favourite band, and- oh, all your friend’s at a birthday party that you seemed to have not been invited too.

Its no surprise that you feel more lousy than when you originally logged on. Social media encourages ‘social competition’ by causing it’s users to feel jealous, envious and discontent with our lives as opposed to the feeling of popularity, involvement, support, love and care we expect from the so-called warm embrace of our friends and our wider social network. [1] A 2013 article titled “Envy on Facebook: A Hidden Threat to Users’ Life Satisfaction?” studied 600 participants of the social network website and found that 1 in 3 felt worse after visiting the site – especially if they viewed vacation photos, or spent extended time on without posting their own content to feel validated. [2] The study also stated “past research has linked consumption of social information on FB to such undesirable outcomes as jealousy, increase in social tension, social overload, isolation and even depression,” and that “passive following exacerbates envy feelings, which decrease life satisfaction. From a provider’s perspective, our findings signal that users frequently perceive Facebook as a stressful environment, which may, in the long-run, endanger platform sustainability.” [2] So indeed, it would appear as though Facebook has grown into something quite insidious and dark…where it once was a platform to leisurely engage with friends, has now matured into a source of stress and tension- linked to increasing pressures and strains of conformity on users. Interestingly, the study noted behaviours that I often see mimicked on Facebook myself, whereby as part of young people’s envy-coping plan, some users may engage in “even greater self-promotion and impression management.” [2] In fact, it was interesting to read the study’s interpretation of the increased self-promotion as a reaction to jealousy of other users, mentioning: “After all, overstatement of persona accomplishment is a common reaction to envy feelings This behaviour can trigger the phenomenon we denoted as the self-promotion – envy spiral, with users reacting with even more self-promotional content to the self-promotion of others. As a result, envy-ridden character of the platform climate can become even more pronounced” [2].

So whilst we may all begin with the intention of using social media for pleasure and relaxation, given the opportunity, and the ‘correct circumstances’ (e.g. increased insecurity, low self-esteem, heightened feelings of depression and anxiety all relatively common in the adolescent population), the negative seed can take root in the user’s psyche and grow- nurtured by the negative cycle of envy-self promotion-gratification-validation. Perhaps we can agree at the moment, for most of us, social media’s positive aspects currently supersede the negative aspects…however, how do we know when it begins to become detrimental to us? How do we identify when we become victims to the superficial publicity and self-promotion-envy spiral? Will we be able to tell at all? Like any addiction, the user does not wish to stop or acknowledge the damage the drug/tool has inflicted- nor does he/she often even realize they have a problem. The same applies for Facebook. Thus brings us to our question- how important is it for adolescents and pre-teens to be educated about the usage of the internet and its detrimental side effects? How young is too young? For adolescents who are already in a pressured environment socially, mentally and emotionally, who are developing, and experiencing a period of insecurity, often low self-esteem and uncertain sense of identity, what can be done to help prevent these detrimental aspects of social media affecting the adolescent mind set and culminating in mental illness? How do we identity those who need help? When does a teenager’s right to privacy end and the greater need for supervision on the internet begin- when we suspect that the teenager may be suffering online? Before? Or is it all a matter of teaching the new generations how to be more resilient and confident in themselves and if so, why should we expect them to do this- when this stress has previously been a void and absent factor in generations before them….do we even understand the full extent of social media and internet usage has on the developing brain?

The envy/misery and gratification/validation cycle of Social Media Addiction

 

 

What are your thoughts on Facebook?

Are we an addicted society?

What needs to be done?

 

References

[1]Sifferlin, A. 2013. Why Facebook Makes You Feel Bad About Yourself. [online] 24th January. Available at: http://healthland.time.com/2013/01/24/why-facebook-makes-you-feel-bad-about-yourself/ [Accessed: 26 Mar 2014].

[2] Krasnova, H., Wenninger, H., Widjaja, T. and Buxmann, P. 2013. Envy on Facebook: A Hidden Threat to Users’ Life Satisfaction?. p. 92.